Monthly Archives: January 2013

A Note on Suffering:

Suffering is the human condition: an unavoidable aspect to the state of being alive.  Discomfort, disease, death, heartache, loss.  The lows.
For the past few months I’ve been called upon and written to, by more friends and family than ever before, calling out for support in times of emotional need.  Shit is hitting the fan.  Relatives are dying.  Solid loving relationships are crumbling, lots of them.  Many are being thrown into existential crises of sorts.  What am I doing?  What is wrong with this picture?  Why me?  When will it end?
There is light on the other side of this I promise you.  To those walking through the valley of suffering, I’m so very sorry that you are going through this right now.  I believe you are capable of coming through to the other side.  There is beauty and joy and light surrounding you constantly whether or not you have the clarity right now to see it.  It is not a cave, it is a tunnel.  Sometimes even a rite of passage.


I believe we are on a path.  We are here to learn and grow from each and every set of experiences that fall into our lap.  When we find ourselves in times of grief and suffering we have a conscious choice to either wallow in it and scream dirty things into the dark sky or decide to rise.  We can decide to get exactly what these circumstances are trying to give us.  Learn to let go.  Learn to move forward despite setbacks.  Learn to love in the face of heartbreak.
(A note on love:  There is no such thing as too much love.  There is no way you can miss out on the love of your life by loving everything that crosses your path today in this moment.  If you are worried about missing out on your next true one, don’t.  Think of them as a planet, coming into your orbit with a gravitational pull.  There is no mistaking that kind of attraction.  It’s simply a force of nature.  You cannot miss out on such an event because you were facing the other direction.  “Tackle the motherfucking shit out of love” -Cheryl Strayed)
Another reason people don’t get what they want in life, a source of suffering, is the factor of self worth.  A lot of people don’t believe they deserve to be happy, don’t deserve to be loved, don’t deserve to be treated well, paid well, or simply don’t have the courage to walk away from what society tells them is a good job in order to do whatever makes their heart soar.
It’s time to take a stand for yourself.
Whether it is substance abuse, unkind lovers, or jobs and towns that aren’t satisfying, decide for yourself to become the possibility of exactly what you indeed deserve, and make it fucking happen.
Find something that lights your heart up and do it.  THAT IS YOUR DUTY!
Play it, paint it, “write like a motherfucker” as Cheryl Strayed would put it.
Enough is enough.  It is time to take a good hard look at the suffering in your life and choose to step into the light. Accept no less than every inch of what you deserve and each and every one of you deserves the very hot-damn best in life.
Reach out to the people in your world, especially the ones that make you happy, those are the ones to move forward with and the ones to lean upon in times of need.  Shed as much light on this earth as you can for the brief moment that you are blessed to inhabit it.  Thank you for being in my life.  I am forever grateful to be a part of yours.

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